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You know how you have those memories that are seared into your memory bank? I remember my dad taking me to my first Milwaukee Brewer game and being petrified to walk across the open air catwalks to our seats. I remember the first winter after my older sister got married and taking my 4 year old sister sledding (I was 6) down the hill behind our house and she ran her head into a parked truck (there was a parking lot at the bottom of the hill). But this memory, I clearly remember. Talking my parents into buying an insane Christmas album.
We were shopping at Kohls in 1985. Yes, they existed. In Wisconsin. Janesville, Wisconsin to be specific. And as we wandered through the store, I looked at the cassette department. Yes, they had cassettes in the store. And there it was.
Boys and girls, I was 8 years old and I had a Pound Puppy named Harvey that I loved dearly. I also had some smaller ones and I don’t remember their names. But Harvey? I remember clearly. I HAD to have this cassette. Of course, there was no previewing what was behind the wrapping on the package. My dad looked at it, and noticed what the little white box in the upper left hand corner said. Do you see it? Can you read it? Sing and Bark. Yes. Sing and Bark. He questioned that and I confidently (as confidently as an 8 year old could) said that it couldn’t be that bad. And with much begging, offering to do extra chores and whatever I could do to sweeten the pot, my parents acquiesced and the big red package with the tiny. little cassette was mine. I couldn’t wait to listen to it. We got home and I opened the package, put it on my dad’s big stereo system in the living room. And waited. The music began. And much to my parents’ chagrin…..it was kids singing and people bark singing Jingle Bells. I loved it. My parents? Nope. Not so much.
See, my dad was a pastor, and his definition of “Christmas music” was far different than mine. Oh sure, we had the classic Andy Williams Christmas album. But there was also Christmas choral music, organ music, and Bach Christmas music and much more of the ilk. I enjoyed that too, but I was just as much a fan of Feliz Navidad, Grandma Got Run over By a Reindeer and other novelty, silly type Christmas songs.
So what happened to the cassette? It was banished to my room. I couldn’t listen to it on the big stereo. Only my tiny little boombox in my room. And I wish I still had that silly thing. However, it lives on YouTube, so you can check it out in all of it’s insane gloriousness.
That was the strangest Christmas album I’ve ever owned. What’s yours? Give a comment with what you have. Does it top the Pound Puppies?